Chain Reaction
by Twice DeFun
Summary: When you need love, who are you going to call? Dumbledore of course! Warning: Slash! Slash! Slash!
1. First Time

Neville came to Dumbledore's door; he wanted to tell him something.  
  
He wanted to tell him he had his first erection but it was at a boy.  
  
Dumbledore answered the door. "Oh hi there Neville" he said in a passionate voice.  
  
Neville stumbled back in a passionate feeling, wondering what he would do.  
  
Finally he found the courage to tell Dumbledore. "Which boy?" Dumbledore asked.  
  
"Ummmm.... This may sound weird but, well ...mumble mumble...You." Neville answered  
  
"Really?" Dumbledore said, "Well that's quite odd. Do you have feelings for me?" he asked.   
  
"Well sir, I planned to meet you for some time and I guess I have feelings for you." cried out Neville  
  
"Well, I never told anyone this, but I have the same feelings for you. The only reason I accepted you to this school is because you are one sexy stud." screamed Dumbledore.  
  
Neville cried out in pain of his erection, "Shouldn't we go inside your office, HEADMASTER!"  
  
"Why, yes we should" Dumbledore said, batting his eyelashes.  
  
Neville Said in a harsh whisper, "I yearn for you pleasurable sex!"  
  
"I might be old but I am a tiger in bed Hun, you ain't seen nothing yet. Shall we have torture sex?" said Dumbledore, hitting Neville's ass.  
  
"Your the Headmaster aren't you, why don't you decide?" said Neville  
  
"Oh I love being headmaster. Call me master my sex slave!" yelped Dumbledore  
  
Neville replied "Master, Oh pleasurable Master, Fuck me Fuck me bad!"  
  



	2. Three's A Charm

"Tootles!" said Dumbledore as Neville left his office. "And do your homework next time!" he said, winking.  
  
Neville left with a small smile and wondered why he didn't invite him again, oh well.   
  
As Neville was walking down the hall Crabbe and Goyle walked past him, heading to Dumbledore's office.  
  
Crabbe and Goyle were staring at each other every few seconds, i mean staring, down there!  
  
They kept on slapping eachothers butts too, until they reached Dumbledore's office.  
  
Crabbe looked at Goyle and said "Baby Cakes, can you knock?"  
  
"No Prob, my little love muffin!" Goyle said, pulling out a knife.  
  
Crabbe looked at it with pleasure as Goyle stuck it in the door. For it was their sex toy.  
  
All a sudden Dumbledore pulled open the door. "I have been waiting for your pleasureable comfort, oh baby, boys do come in and chat, if you know what i mean!" *pointing down there*  
  
"Wha Wha WHAT?" all of them screamed, taking off their shirts.  
  
Then suddenly Dumbledore jumped to the closet, mumbled some spell and made them dressed like Tarzan meets Zorro!  
  
"Have you been practicing?" Yelled Dumbledore at the top of his lungs "Yes we have, with this beautiful knife you sent to us, we can cut anyones clothing in half in a second."  
  
"No!" Dumbledore said while taking off his boxers " You know, IT!"  
  
"Of course we know IT!, it came with instructions, and anyway we have been practicing on girls." Said Goyle.  
  
All a sudden Crabbe looked down at Dumbledores 'area' "Whoa where is your..."  
  
"well i guess you can tell now that i am female." Dumbledore whispered.  
  
"But, but, how did this happen?" Crabbe and Goyle said, concerned.  
  
Dumbledore sat on the bed and started to cry as he blumbered through the process of elimination of .....well......you know.......and for all you slow people......DOWN THERE!  
  
"It all started with Hagrid, he pulled out his umbrella and poof!" cried Dumbledore  
  
Crabbe and Goyle stared in disapprovement "What did you do to make him so mad?"  
  
"Well, I, I, made love to Fang." said Dumbledore, sniffing.  
  
Goyle starting to back away, "Did it feel as good as this?" Sticking his wang without notice, you know where.  
  
"Oww!" Dumbedore yelled, "Get THAT off my eye!"  
  
Goyle looked in suprise at his well his used to be area and saw a thrid eye.  
  
  
  



	3. Small Means Everything's Small

Crabbe and Goyle came out of Dumbledores office sweating. As soon as they left they ran all the way to there Dormintory.  
  
They past a short little guy about the size of a small child, wearing a nice new pillow case, and looking like he wanted something bad, real bad!  
  
Who was this litte person? Dobby of course! As Crabbe and Goyle ran by, Dobby started running himself, towards Dumbledore's office.  
  
Dumbledore now had a little sign for all the horny people (and house elves) to see, it read: DUMBLEDORE'S OFFICE OF PLEASURE  
  
But of course, there was some magic on the sign. Anyone who was not horny it read : A. Dumbledore, Headmaster  
  
Dumbledore opened the door and as Dobby came closer Dumbledore came out and said in a hushed voice "do you have an appointmen?" Then he screamed at Dobby for no apparent reason.  
  
"M m master did I do something wrong? Did I not dress sexy enough for you? You sexy you!" whispered Dobby nervously.  
  
"Well come on in you mere sexy slave of mine." Dumbledore said as he sat on a bed looking at a Playgal mag.  
  
Right next to the Playgal Mag was some hand cream lotion. You know what Dumbledore was doing!   
  
"OWW OWWW!" screamed Dobby as he skillfully stripped down to a thin paper jockstrap.  
  
"Take off that jockstrap, Dobby, let me see what machine you got in there!" whimpered Dumbledore.  
  
"Sir, Master, Sir!" Dobby said like a G.I. Joe doll. ( If they could talk)  
  
Then, slowly Dobby took off his jockstrap. What a suprise Dumbledore had!   
  
For it was only a treestump compared to the big oaktrees Crabbe and Goyle had.  
  
"You call that a wang?" Dumbledore said disappointed. "Luckly, I have an extra stash of Swedish Penis Enlarger's."  
  
Then Dumbledore took off all his clothes except his underwear, which to Dobby's surprise, was a jockstrap just like his!  
  
Dobby laughed at that, and than spat on his prat.  
  
"Take that silly thing off," Dobby screamed, "you're making me cry!"  
  
Wasting no time, Dumbledore grapped the front of his jockstrap and ripped it right off, leaving a big tear.  
  
And Dobby got sucked into a big black hole, and died.  
  
Right before he died he saw the image of a huge gigantic eye, you know exactly where you got sucked into.  
  
This also, was the way Moaning Myrtle REALLY died.  
  



End file.
